The term dive bar is thrown around pretty loosely in New York. It’s frequently misapplied to everything from the Neighborhood Pool Joint to the Jerkoff Sports Bar. However, the editors at New York On Tap are true aficionados of The Dive, and are not about to feature any bar in our New York Dive Bar crawl which doesn’t meet our strict and discerning criteria.
Dive bar crawl inclusion rules
1. At least one full time dedicated alcoholic must be on the premises at all times.
2. The top shelf may match, but may never exceed the bar set by the following liquors: Gin: Beefeater Whiskey: Jameson’s Rum: Bacardi Vodka: Smirnoff
3. All of the following words must be found in the bathroom graffiti (extra points for crayon): Boy’s Room a. Smell b. Balls c. “for a good time” d. Pee Girl’s Room a. Smell b. Tampon c. BJ d. PMS
4. Female bartenders should do their best to convey the impression to their male patrons htat, regardless of how fat, ugly, broke or boring they may be, if the moon was right and they didn’t already have a boyfriend that they just might sleep with them.
5. Male bartenders, regardless of whether or not the moon is right or if they have a girlfriend, should be friendly and cordial to their female patrons (no matter how fat, ugly, broke or boring they may be) after they sleep with them